The State Department has a long history of responding negatively to things in the public sphere that are anything short of complimentary, a vengeful side for employees who violate omerta, and no tolerance for critical discussion. They also really lack a sense of humor.
So it was with some interest that I found what looks like State Department press guidance being used as a snot rag by some homeless guy at the Foggy Bottom Metro station this morning. I can’t speak to its authenticity (best check Wikileaks in a few days) and the Department will neither confirm nor deny nor cover their nose while sneezing…
PRESS GUIDANCE – WE MEANT WELL – BY THAT SOB
– Mr. Van Buren is a disgruntled employee/ex-employee and his remarks are his own. (If asked: don’t believe anything he says, he’d rather work at Walmart)
– We have not read Mr. Van Buren’s remarks and thus have no comment (hope the news cycle makes this all go away)
– We’ll have a toady write a “personal” Op-Ed that we’ll force some newspaper to publish as our snappy comeback in a week or two. Look for that.
– We disagree with Mr. Van Buren’s assessment. The proud men and women of the military and the Department of State deserve better (wave flag until commercial)
– We have no comment but to wish Mr. Van Buren well on his new venture (imply he got fired for cause)
– Mr. Van Buren was a low-level employee without access to the events and information he claims to have knowledge of (so take that loser!)
– No comment (but leak to someone that Van Buren is a crazy man, years of bad behavior, should’ve been dropped a long time ago, really off the rails, Diplomatic Security has had their eye on him for years, he just made this up to get money for his meth habit, his mother poses for Crack Whore Magazine…)
Copyright © 2013. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. The views expressed here are solely those of the author(s) in their private capacity and do not in any way represent the views of the Department of State, the Department of Defense or any other entity of the US Government. The Department of State does not approve, endorse or authorize this blog or book. Follow us on Twitter!