• Trump Personally Re-Arrests Muslim Clock Kid (Satire)

    September 22, 2015

    Tags: ,
    Posted in: Other Ideas

    NMC_15MohamedAhmed2


    Last week was a notable one in terms what’s left of our political process.

    Texas stormtroopers saved everyone by arresting a ninth grade brown science nerd for building a clock that they wanted sooooo badly to be a bomb, followed by Obama inviting the kid to the White House to promote science (the Pentagon needs many bomb makers ahead of future wars with Muslims), followed by Donald Trump remaining silent in the face of one of his supporters announcing that Obama is a foreigner and a Muslim and that secret jihadi training camps no one can see are scattered all over America.

    (That was all sadly true; here’s the satire part.)


    CNN and other entertainment outlets all headlined a story earlier today showing Trump has personally flown to Texas and re-arrested the science nerd bomb making Muslim kid, charging him with not being fabulous, and with conspiring to make others think for no reason that he was thinking of considering creating a weapon of mass destruction that never would exist. Such a crime exists in the imagination of Trump, who stated “That was good enough for Ronald Reagan, and good enough for the Greatest Generation, so it is good enough for someone else.”

    “The key reason I knew I had to act,” said Trump from his hot tub attended to by scores of virgins, “was that visit to the White House. In these kinds of Islamic terror plots, you look to connect the dots. So look what we have — a Muslim builds the first half of a bomb, minus only massive amounts of explosives and a trigger. He escapes from law enforcement because of the liberal mass media. And then he just happens to show up the next day at the home of a prominent Muslim, and that home just happens to be right inside Washington DC, inside the White House itself!”

    “It was all red flags, red alarms and red scares as far as the eye could see,” frothed Trump. “So I acted. Any other paranoid raving lunatic would have done the same.”

    “And lastly, answer me this. Where was Hillary? Hmmm?”

    When reached for comment in Paradise, the ghost of Osama bin Laden chuckled to himself, and mumbled “The Americans, they are eating themselves now, my work here is done.”



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  • Recent Comments

    • RICH BAUER said...

      1

      The GOP has morphed from the Grouchy Old People to Gentiles Opposed to Pope. Group of Paranoids was close third.

      What’s Black and White and Hates MUSLIMS?

      The GOP Ticket.

      09/22/15 11:40 AM | Comment Link

    • Bruce said...

      2

      Amerikaners Eating THEMSELVES?
      Not to mention Limey neocon collaborating lapdogs:
      http://rinf.com/alt-news/latest-news/piggate-farce-story-camerons-private-part-dead-pigs-mouth-resonates-gloriously-online/ !!

      09/22/15 11:51 AM | Comment Link

    • John Poole said...

      3

      I suspect this whole incident was a setup by the father who wants to be a celebrity on Dancing With The Stars.

      09/22/15 5:45 PM | Comment Link

    • John Poole said...

      4

      Contestant not celebrity. Sorry.

      09/22/15 6:47 PM | Comment Link

    • bloodypitchfork said...

      5

      John Poole said…

      “I suspect this whole incident was a setup by the father who wants to be a celebrity on Dancing With The Stars.”unquote

      Hahahahahahahahaha! Notwithstanding the fact the very few people really LOOKED at his self described creation of a “clock”..I think the probability is more closely aligned with this…

      The ‘clock’ is a commercial bedside alarm clock removed from its casing”.

      http://www.theguardian.com/science/2015/sep/20/richard-dawkins-questions-ahmed-mohamed-motive-backlash

      On the other hand, if my intuition of 40 years of doing similar things to build a recording studio are wrong…I’ll eat my words. However..I think Dawkins is on to something.

      09/22/15 8:01 PM | Comment Link

    • bloodypitchfork said...

      6

      ps..and if Dawkins is right, Obama is the epitome of the Dumbest Country on the Planet.

      09/22/15 8:02 PM | Comment Link

    • bloodypitchfork said...

      7

      ps 2… moreover..Barnum would be howling while rolling on the floor in gut splitting laughter.

      Not that this young man meant to fool anyone. He isn’t that old. I believe he thought “create” was a manifestation of taking parts of one thing and creating another thing. Unfortunately, INVENTING is a whole nuther animal. He just wasn’t old enough to realize it. On the other hand..grown men and women on this planet didn’t have enough cognizant dissonance to see this was a case of 14 yr olds naivety, while the grownups stupidity placed the motive into the absurd WMD mindset of current Murika. Well..all I got to say is ..DEAR MURIKA.. you fucking dolts. you really are stupid.

      09/22/15 8:15 PM | Comment Link

    • Bruce said...

      8

      0 is the epitome, indeed; look at the incomparable plagiarist he chose for veep! (So he sees the potential of a young amateur to follow in the their halfascist goose-steps!) But actually, BS (Bush Shadow) Barry-0 Doesn’t Give A BUCK! :
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlAAYwUfm0s

      09/22/15 9:20 PM | Comment Link

    • bloodypitchfork said...

      9

      Well..someone else actually found the parts..from a 70’s alarm clock on ebay.

      http://blogs.artvoice.com/techvoice/2015/09/17/reverse-engineering-ahmed-mohameds-clock-and-ourselves/

      I don’t know what’s going to happen in this regard, but..

      somehow, this comes to mind..

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rp6-wG5LLqE

      09/23/15 5:09 AM | Comment Link

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