• Obama to Solve Syrian Refugee Problem with Kickstarter

    October 16, 2015

    Tags: ,
    Posted in: Iraq, Syria

    kickstarter


    If ever tragedy descended into sick comedy, here it is: Obama plans on solving the massive humanitarian refugee crisis in the Middle East via a Kickstarter campaign.

    I’m not kidding, though one can easily see the headline above on an Onion story.


    The U.S. government’s war in Iraq and Syria has already cost American taxpayers between $780 and $930 million, and could amount to over one billion dollars a month if U.S. efforts intensify on the scale demanded by many Congress. The wars are directly responsible for the flow of refugees out of the Middle East into Europe.

    But don’t worry. Obama is ready to help, but he wants you to pay for it. And no, not just with tax dollars. He wants you to pony up additional money via Kickstarter. The White House says “This isn’t just about what a government can do. It’s about what every single one of us — as a citizen, a company, or an organization — can do to make sure that those displaced or impacted by this crisis have everything they need to survive and find safe haven.”

    Also, and this is huge, Obama wants you to “Get involved: Spread the word using #AidRefugees on social media.” Because nothing can help people without food, water and in need of medical care better than knowing suburban Americans and privileged college kids are putting up hashtags. Here, kid, eat this Tweet.

    “We have a moral responsibility to do what we can for families forced from their homes,” Obama said about the crowdfunding campaign, in a cheerleader-in-chief effort to get people to donate to the crisis.


    As of this writing the Kickstarter campaign has yielded about $1.2 million, about the cost one a couple of bombs dropped on Syria or Iraq during time you’ve spent reading this.

    Over four million people are registered refugees. So the Kickstarter money works out to about 25 cents per person, Here, kid, eat this quarter.

    Lame and sad as all that is, the lamest and saddest thing is not that the U.S. government wants us to pay for this like it was some new dot com startup, but that the U.S. government knows damn well that what the refugees need more than anything is something money can’t buy: a safe place to immigrate to.

    As of September 2015, the U.S. had only accepted 1,500 Syrian refugees.


    Feel good yet about that $20 you just put on your credit card over at Kickstarter yet?



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  • Recent Comments

    • Helen Marshall said...

      1

      Well Marx was certainly right about one thing: tragedy repeats as farce.

      10/16/15 12:14 PM | Comment Link

    • John Poole said...

      2

      Why not some sort of endentured servant program where one sponsors one migrant who has fled a country we bombed into anarchy. They get to stay in one’s unheated garage and does yard work, some light repair such as repointing the chimney stack, keeps the cars sparkling clean, The way I figure it I already prepaid for such help via my tax dollars being used to help the poor guy be free of a ruthless dictator. These thoughts were published under my unregistered rutabaga rag piggybacking on PVB’s blog.

      10/16/15 1:21 PM | Comment Link

    • John Poole said...

      3

      Sorry about the syntax and the implication that my ponderings are actual publishing. They aren’t.

      10/16/15 4:26 PM | Comment Link

    • teri said...

      4

      Hey, the next thing will be a kickstarter for American families. God knows Congress isn’t doing anything about poor Americans, old Americans, unemployed, part-time employed, underemployed, foreclosed-upon, and etc. Americans.

      10/16/15 5:05 PM | Comment Link

    • Bruce said...

      5

      ANYTHING But abandon the GawDEM Bush CRU$ADE$!

      10/16/15 8:13 PM | Comment Link

    • bloodypitchfork said...

      6

      quote”But don’t worry. Obama is ready to help, but he wants you to pay for it. And no, not just with tax dollars. He wants you to pony up additional money via Kickstarter. “unquote

      Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

      I’ve got a better idea. Let’s start a Kickstarter to fund a lobotomy for him.

      10/17/15 2:22 PM | Comment Link

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